Finding You and Your Vision

Finding You and Your Vision

Sometimes life ends up being very different from what we thought we wanted or it just looks different than it started. When that happens, what do you do? I tell you what you do- You readjust and keep living. If what you once wanted to do no longer satisfies? That’s okay. Begin to see that if you’re bored, stagnant, not challenged or you are ready to switch gears, it’s time to make a decision. 

Please do not make any rash decisions here. Just some reflection and a little inventory taking is encouraged. Afterall, you’ve got to take care of you. You’ve got to make time to do what makes you happy. Finding your passion may not be easy at first, but maybe you need to try new things. Whatever you do, do not quit, do not give up, and do not resign to live a mediocre life. There is life left in you. There is purpose in you. Look for it. Greater lies on the other side of difficult. Believe that! Push forward. Even without all the answers- push forward! 

 It may not be easy. You may have to make some hard decisions. You know what?

 Do It Anyway!

Chasing Destiny

Chasing Destiny

Can you taste it, smell it, see it? The “it” of which I speak is Your Destiny. If you cannot, you will not possess it. What wakes you up, keeps you up, and is always on your mind to do and make known to the world? That’s a clue. It’s called your purpose. Destiny is where performing your purpose will take you. We all have one. Some of us are too scared to walk in our purpose, some are still trying to figure it out, and others just Do It Anyway! Which one are you? 

Don’t feel bad if you’re afraid. Afraid is good energy misdirected. Instead of focusing on the “how”, focus on your “why” and “The Who” which is God because God will guide you. I know it’s scary, but trust me, you want to go on this journey. So, say yes today to a journey you can’t see, to the details being hidden, and to the glimpse of glory He’s given you. 

Go on, start the best chapter of your life. You chasing your destiny will impact many for good. You not chasing your destiny leaves all those folks untouched. Don’t you want to be a light, a blessing, a difference maker? 

Life is so hard at times and full of difficult decisions. Choose the ones that give you peace even if the details are blurry. Go on, live, chase, do!

Do It Anyway!

Learning to trust God in the wait.

Learning to trust God in the wait.

Seasons of waiting are common to us all. But, how do you make it through? How do you trust God in the wait? Life is up. Life is down. Life is smooth. You know He has given you signs to move toward purpose, things are good and moving in the right direction, and then it all seemingly stops. What!? Or, does it? I’m here to tell you that God is still there. When He seems quiet, trust Him. A few things are happening in the quiet. Read on:

1) He is testing your faith. 

This may seem cruel to you. But, the test is not for Him. It is for you. You need to know that your faith is at least the size of a mustard seed and that You believe God is Who He says He is. Only you can go through this “test”. No one can tell you how long it will last, but I urge you to simply tell Him every day- I surrender.

2) He is preparing the way.

Yes, God is all powerful, but He is also a God of order. I know this because the Bible says so. See Isaiah 44:24. But, He does not just move people and circumstances around in the blink of an eye to appease us. No. He takes time. People need to be affected. I can’t explain it, but in my own life as I look back on some  things, I see how God had a hand in the wait. I also see how the wait was for my good. Oh, to have received what I wanted then! What a dire mistake it would have been. So, trust that He is preparing the way and you for what’s next. 

3) He is preparing you.

Yes, you. I know you think you’re ready, but there may be something else you’ll need for the next level and in this waiting period or season of life that is what you should be doing? Preparing. Keep trusting God. Talk to Him. You will know by and by as my grandpa used to say. Just keep growing. And keep praying. 

I don’t know the secrets of the universe or what is going on with you. But, I encourage you in your wait to draw closer to God. He will draw close to you. You’ll soon forget about wanting it to be over and you’ll just go through it in peace. Trusting The Zone who knows it all. Selah.

In the end, it’s okay. If it’s not okay, it’s not the end. Hold on. Keep pushing toward purpose. It will all become clear by and by.

Kaydy

5 Reasons Why You Need Organization

5 Reasons Why You Need Organization

I have been paying close attention to myself and others as I grow as an entrepreneur and delve deeper into my gifts and encourage others in theirs. It has become evident that if I and if You do no get organized, the purpose we are called to fulfill will not get done. l don’t care if it concerns work, family, church, athletics, or cleaning the house. If we are not organized or have a plan, we will fail. Sure, some succeed. I mean lets face it, most of us have learned how to knock things out in the home stretch (procrastinate). But what about not stressing and being successful? Wouldn’t that be nice! So, if you said yes, let’s get serious and get organized.

5 Reasons why you need to get organized:

1. You get more done
Not saying anything new here. We just need to be productive. Lack of organization messes with your mental space. If the physical is a “hot mess” you will get nada done. Clear the cutter. Then, you will see how easy and stress less it is to be creative and work better. Knowing where everything is and being able to grab it without a possee is a good feeling. So, get organized, so you can get more done.

2. The quality of your work increases
I don’t know about you, but when I am organized, I can do a million more things. I’m the kind of person that needs the kitchen clean first in order to cook. I clean as I go along cooking so there’s less mess at the end. But when I sit to write, I also have to have my writing area clean. I need quiet. I need all my supplies. I need time, do I’ve carved it out. What about you? Do you know what you need in order to be more productive? Try organization. I bet you will never go back to working in a tornado again. Lol! You know what I mean. The desk that has everything on it but what you need. Fix it asap.

3. You avoid distraction
Oh this one right here is good! All that clutter=distraction. Pictures and cell phones and email, etc. will distract you. Remove them. Turn off the TV. Get organized and decide what your thinking space must have and what it cannot have. You need focus and distraction is the enemy of focus. Get organized and you’ll avoid distraction. Make a point to remove all distractions.

4. You can adjust quickly if needed
If you need to switch gears to work on another task, you can do so easily because you are??? #organized Yep, not a hard one here. Get yourself together. Carve out your time and you will be able to complete one task and move on to the next. No looking for the next thing. It’s already penciled in to be next. It’s already neatly laid put or filed.

5. Clarity
Being organized breeds clarity. It’s true. Once you have your schedule set and space clear, you will find it easy to get clear on what your good ideas are and what you should do next. I don’t know what you need, but I know you can get clear quicker in a clean environment.

So, I hope you have been inspired to get it together. There is still so much to discuss on this topic, but get organized so you can experience these five. You don’t have to work so hard. Get the things done in yo uh know you need to, so life can be smooth.

Whether it’s with your kids, on your job, or in your own business, organization is crucial to your success.

It takes time. It’s not easy to change your ways.

Do It Anyway!

Men, it’s okay to take a break and heal

Men, it’s okay to take a break and heal

As I’ve been delving into writing on relationships and cohosting a weekly #twitterchat called #destinydating, I have become more aware of how men and women are screwed up. Let me explain. Destiny dating is all about dating with marriage in mind and utilizing Biblical principals in the process. A big block to finding a good mate in the same place as you is the messages men and women carry with them from relationship to relationship. The negative self talk, the clichés, the pain of a failed relationship, or the dissolution without solution. And, so on. The point is we spend a great deal of time helping women heal because supposedly, we are more emotional and fragile. Well, I want it known that men need to take a break and heal as well when they experience breakups. Men need not partake of the usual two days and nights out with the boys, but a real period of not dating in order to reflect and process the good and the bad of that past relationship. As I look at my past relationships, I see hurt men who went on to hurt other women. Not to say every man was damaged, but a few needed detoxing and did not do so. They moved on to me, her, and her, etc. doing what “men do”. If we could have only reached those guys and said, “Heal up dude”, life would be better.

Now, I can’t see the future, but I bet a healed person could end a relationship as needed without inflicting unnecessary pain because they see that it is just not a good fit. However, if one has not healed or learned to deal with things not working out, they will resort to the same ways to medicate or hide the pain, i.e., jump into another relationship. Our boys and men need to be taught to explore their feelings and to heal in peace before adding another unsuspecting soul to the pot. That’s called baggage. Unless the bags get delivered, they just weigh you down.

What no one will tell you is that if you would do the work now to get to know the girl or woman you’re dating, you could avoid some of this pain. No one says that. Instead, they say. “Yeah man, I’d date her if I were you!” They never say, “She’s immature, selfish, out to use you, not looking to settle down, not wife material, etc.” No! They look at what you probably looked at- “the physical”. There is more to a person than their outside appearance. Get to know them. Get to know if you really are a good fit. And yes, you can do everything right and things can still fall apart. You’ve got to live and you’ve got to chase your dreams. Be prepared to forgive and release if it goes south. But, do the work!

So, it’s a short post, but one that I mean from the bottom of my heart. Isn’t it time you changed the pattern? Why not you? Yeah, you can do it. Tell your boys no and do you instead. No new girl. No night out. Just you, your thoughts, and the truth. What do you really want? Who are you? Be honest and live.

Scary isn’t it?

Do It Anyway!

Success and the Single Mom: The Importance of Having a Dream

Success and the Single Mom: The Importance of Having a Dream

I have really been pondering life and statistics lately. Why are so many single moms struggling? How can we really get the support needed? In regards to the struggle, well, I know it is because most didn’t plan on being a single mom and it is just plain old hard to do it all ALONE. Finding support can be hard. I know from experience. But, it is not impossible. Oftentimes, there are resources within our reach that we just don’t consider. My story today involves me stepping out of my comfort zone that I’ve built and trusting someone with my dream. Trusting them to care for it like me. And my hope is that it will inspire you.

I guess the real question here is “why are you not living out your dreams or looking for resources in unusual people and places?” I thought about it and decided it’s time to empower you. To go from where you are to where you want to be, you must take a step. Take a step toward your future. It can no longer be acceptable to stay the same. You cannot stay where you are.

This past weekend, I took a step. I went to DC for a Mastermind. If you don’t know what that is then it is a group of people who get together and learn from and encourage one another. We were brought together by Paul Carrick Brunson @pcbbrunson on Twitter. He is a professional matchmaker, TV host, author, and the genius behind #MentorMonday. We all came together for day to share our stories, dreams for our businesses, and to get tips and critical feedback. His Director of Operations is also phenomenal and co-led the Mastermind, Ella Rucker @ellalaverne. Ella is a blogger, a single mom, a speaker and so much more. Having the opportunity to work with both of them was Amazing! They had additional guest lecturers who blew me away with their knowledge, kindness, and willingness to encourage and inspire us. It was a good day. AND, I met so many awesome entrepreneurs who I know I’ll keep in touch with forever and some we’ll even collaborate on projects real soon.

I one day will meet all of them again. We’ll keep in touch and inspire each other throughout the year. It is rewarding to have someone get “IT”/ get “me and my dreams”. And sadly, sometimes our family and friends don’t. This is why a Mastermind was/is so important.

I mentioned my trip because I want you to know that often our success lies outside of our comfort zone. If you want better, you have to move in that direction. Being a single parent and being successful may not be easy, but it is worth it. What do you know you need to do to go to your next level? Okay. Let me put it this way. If you could do anything other than what you do right now, what would it be ? That’s your answer. Make a move. Move into your purpose. I am.

May God bless you and keep you on the journey.

Kaydy
Do It Anyway!

If not now, when?

If not now, when?

Good Morning,

I’m up thinking about all of you on my last day in the nation’s capital. I came down for a 1 day Mastermind and the breakthroughs I’ve had are amazing and so worth it. As I prepare to return home, I want to encourage you on your journey. So, I ask you “If you don’t chase your dreams now, when will you?” This question is important because we live in the place to make it happen, hands down, no excuses.

This morning, I am challenging you to write your goals, your dream, your vision and your purpose down as soon as you can. If you are not willing to figure out your “why”, you will not be able to do the “what”. We have so many examples around us of people being successful at living out their purpose. Life is best lived on purpose. So, get up, make a plan, think it through. If you need help figuring out your purpose click here http://wp.me/p4a1FR-af. You are meant for greater. Isn’t it time you figured out your path?

Look, single parenting is really hard. I know. I do it every day, but my boys are blessed and a part of my purpose. I’m meant to do what I have to do with them, and so are you. Let your babies fuel you to your greater. You can accomplish all God has for you even as a single parent. Do it afraid, tired, lonely, with little money, with a lot of money. But, Do It Anyway!

Wishing you the best on the journey,

Kaydy

5 hindrances to pursuing your purpose

5 hindrances to pursuing your purpose

Recently, it dawned on me that everyone doesn’t know why they’re here. And that got me to thinking about how to help. First off, I know we all have jobs and/or careers, but purpose is that deep desire you have on the inside that you must fulfill. It will not only bless you but others. You can’t sleep because it’s calling your name, and every waking moment you dream about it. Purpose is your “why” for living. Although I believe we can have various degrees of purpose throughout life, I do know that it takes courage to pursue it. So, I list five hindrances to pursuing your purpose. Why do some never chase it and grasp it? Why do some start out on the right course but never finish? Let’s see.

Here are 5 hindrances to changing your life for the better and walking in your purpose.

1. Fear of the unknown
Yeah, I said fear. There is no guarantee that gut feeling you have will work and that, my friend, is scary. But, you know deep down the opposite of fear is going to be regret. So, get clear on what you are to do and just chase it. I guarantee that if it’s your purpose, it will not fail.

2. Doubt
You are skeptical about whether this is where you should go and what you should do. That is very logical and wise, but at some point you have to jump into the unknown sea of doubt to discover your possibility. Don’t let your doubts deter you. Research, study, test it even, but do not stay stuck on doubt.

3. Excuses
How many have you come up with? I had at least four before I started blogging. They were time, money, family, and work. As you can see, I started. No more excuses! Kick them to the curb and go for it! Today!

4. No support system
No one in your corner? Or, they come and go? That’s okay. You support yourself until you can connect with like-minded people. There are many of us who have to go alone in the direction of our dreams and our purpose. I think we’ll all be able to say that at some point others came to help. Keep in mind that what you have to do is too important to leave undone just because others can’t see it. It’s your purpose. Get to it.

5. Don’t know where to begin
I’m laughing as I type this because I so get that it’s hard to know where to start. I started almost a year ago on a journey that isn’t complete, but I’m so glad I started. Do you want to say a year from now you should just start or do you want to be walking in your purpose a year from now? Don’t let excuses hold you back. There will always be excuses why not to do it now. You know what I say? Why not now?

We all have a purpose. Will you be one who at the end of life says, “I should have” or will you be able to say, “I did”? Life isn’t easy. Finding, chasing, and living out your purpose isn’t easy. But, once you find it and live it out, you are forever changed (and so are all around you) for the better. Throw off every weighty excuse and Do It Any Way!

XO

Sometimes, even Superwoman needs a break

Sometimes, even Superwoman needs a break

Have you ever felt frazzled, snippy, exhausted? I have, and it is no fun. When that happens, we lose creativity, get on our loved ones nerves, and short circuit our dreams. Not to mention create unnecessary drama. So, what’s the solution? I think this can be remedied by taking a break. Or, taking many breaks rather when we see ourselves teetering on the edge of exhaustion. This is why I build in what I like to call “mommy breaks”. Mommy breaks are my nights out with girlfriends, my alone moments at Starbucks, and basically time set aside to be me. It is my “woosah”, decompress, relax, rejuvenate time. I encourage you to lay down the cape every now and then and live. Not that serving our loved ones isn’t living, but giving and not being poured into is exhausting. So, avoid the meltdown and take a vacay from perfection. Reconnect with you and that joy of yours they love to see will spill out. Your family and friends will thank you.

Get your creativity back. Take a break and have some fun. Call the girls, get a sitter, grab a coffee, catch a movie. Live!

“The house needs cleaning. There’s so much to do.” -You

Do It Anyway!- Me

Wealth and the single mom

Wealth and the single mom

money jar2

 

I do not claim to have learned all there is to know about wealth. I myself am on a quest for knowledge and the total transformation of my life. Yet, I want to encourage every woman who is not living her financial dream to seek out advice, tips, books, instructors, etc., so they, too, can change their lives. The above picture is my actual change jar. It takes me a year or two to fill with my leftover change.  Once it’s full, I take it to one of those machines in the supermarket that counts it for you and collects a small fee in the process. I know. I should take it to my bank. See! I’m not a financial advisor. But, I am a mom who wants to leave a legacy.

Wealth is such a personal thing. I mean it’s relative right? Sure, some inherit it, but somebody somewhere had to first take a chance in the right direction and add in some hard work to build that pile of assets to, in turn, pass along.  I truly believe that as long as we have breath, we can change our lives for the better. That includes finances.

The Bible says in Proverbs 13:22 “A good man leaveth an inheritance to his children’s children.” Wow! I want to do that! Don’t you? It may not happen for me or you the way it happened for others, but the truth is we need to start building (if we haven’t already).

I like to listen to a few folks on advice for saving. The Bible says, “There is wisdom in a multitude of counselors”. I say there is confusion in not having a plan. As a single mom, I have seen lack and abundance (my scale may be just getting by). It (life) has been smooth and it has been rocky. But, GOD has kept me and my boys. He has been faithful. Because of this, I like to be faithful with what he gives me. So, I believe that part of wealth creating is giving. I can’t say I always tithe like I want, but I give. I have charities I support. It makes me feel so good inside to help someone else in need. Try it. It’s amazing how even our little is sometimes greater than what some one else has.

If giving money is not feasible, please find time to show your kids how to give back to others by you all doing charitable work. If money is not a problem, consider mentoring other women on wealth creation. We are blessed to be a blessing.

Side note: The sense of entitlement of the youth these days is at an astronomical level. Even my own kids have tried to act as if the world owes the something. I quickly nip that in the bud. I have them help me serve, and I have them give away toys and clothes. I also had them pick out the boy we sponsor in Africa who is around their age. I talk to them about how blessed we are knowing that they don’t fully understand yet. But, I know one day it will be clear. As I work to build something to leave them, I want to leave my wealth to men who know how to handle it and who know the blessing they hold.

So moms, even if it’s five bucks a week, start saving now. Try the change jar idea. Or, refrain from the delicious $5 coffee for a few weeks and watch it add up. We have more than we think even when to us it is not enough. Saving is a family affair. Get everyone in on the conversation. Make it a contest if you can, but by any means, save.

I pray this post blesses you and your family, and you get started on building your empire.

“Saving is hard, and I have bills,” you say.

Do It Anyway!