5 Challenges to being a single mom to boys during the teen years

5 Challenges to being a single mom to boys during the teen years

As my boys enter the teen years, I have begun to see changes in them. And in me. No one wants to see their kids go in different directions than originally planned when you first held them in your arms; but, sometimes, they do. I am witnessing the “Twilight Zone”. Some of you may be there with me. You know, the monosyllabic responses, no more hugs (because hugs are for little boys), and the “I heard you the first time but I will clean up when I feel like it”. (Previous items thought and not spoken of course. Mama don’t play that). Yet, I go through it because I love them, and I know deep down that this is “their” journey and not mine. I have to let them make some mistakes to learn. After all, isn’t that how we got to be so wise as adults?

Challenge 1: Not answering that urge to pop them when they say something smart.
Challenge 2: Not answering that urge to pop them when they say something smart.
Challenge 3: Not answering that urge to pop them when they say something smart.
Challenge 4: Not answering that urge to pop them when they say something smart.
Challenge 5: Not answering that urge to pop them when they say something smart.

Yes, I noticed all my challenges are the same. And yes, currently, this is my hardest task. I remind myself they are boys becoming men. Hormones are raging and things are happening to them that they do not quite understand. And the Lord knows that neither do I. This is why I have sought out mentors. I’m placing good godly men in their lives. I make sure to keep them in physical activities so that they can let out that steam. Is it easy? No! I cry inside missing my babies. Yet, this is new frontier and we have to brave it together. Discipline does happen at my house. I take things like ALL the ELECTRONICS. And there is no returning them until politeness and actual speaking English to me and not mumbling has returned. Let’s face it. My kids are almost as tall as me and one is bigger, so spanking went away a while ago. But, what I do is talk to them and let them know why they are losing their beloved toys. I call them on their bad attitudes and remind them that we operate in respect in this house. Is it easy? No. But, I have been a teenager before and this is how I know they will survive and so will I. Got the above challenges in your home? Do the work and assess what needs to be removed to get order back. I have some peace right now and it feels good. It’s amazing what no Call of Duty or PS3 will do for the morale in your home. I also recognize that they need someone to talk to about guy stuff and life as a teen. I’m not capable of fully understanding and guiding them in that department although I do my best. I will see them through this even if all my hair goes gray. Challenges come. We nor our kids are perfect. Dig in, do your best, and refuse to lose.

On the road of life, nothing is easy. Do It Any Way!

Kaydy

The Separation Effect- To share or not to share

The Separation Effect- To share or not to share

Sharing a room with a sibling has long been a part of the childhood of many. But, nowadays, kids tend to get their own space if the parents can swing it. Well, when my boys and I moved to our current home, a 3 bedroom, I gave them their own room. Oh, what horrors occurred! The messiness that ensued was too much for this “I like it clean” mama. So, I had them share one room. And, they’d been like that for almost two years until this weekend. I gave in. It was a dungeon ne’er to be a room again. 🙂 Seriously, the odor alone said “separate!” . And to my amazement, they have kept their new found freedom-lands clean. And now I wonder what was I thinking two years ago or could it be maturity has reared it’s lovely head? This sharing or not sharing can be touchy. Thank goodness trial and error still works.

Do your kiddos share? Do they get along? Let’s connect!

We don’t have all the answers and parenting can be tough. Do It Anyway!

Kaydy